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PAR'SHAT VAYECHI: TRUE DEEDS OF KINDNESS ARE PERFORMED WITHOUT ULTERIOR MOTIVES.

12/26/2017

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 אם־נא מצאתי חן בעיניך שׂים־נא ידך תחת ירכי ועשׂית עמדי חסד ואמתאל־נא תקברני במצרים׃
"If now I have found favor in your sight, put your hand under my thigh and promise to deal kindly and truly with me. Do not bury me in Egypt,
 (Gen 47:29 ESV)

You may have noticed that whereas I usually use the CJB for an English text of the Tanach, this time I used a ESV text. The reason for that is because whereas the CJB text represents a correct literate meaning, in this case, , the ESV gives us a more literal text which I need for this midrash. 
The commentary Genesis Rabah 96:5 asks, "Is there such thing as "lovingkindness of lying", that Ya'akov should specify, "lovingkindness and truth"?! 

Medieval Torah commentator Rashi notes that in Gen 47:29, Ya'akov asks for a favor to be done to him once he is deceased. Rashi then expounds on Ya'akov's request to Yoseph by observing that  a favor done for the dead does not generate any reward from the deceased. The cannot say "thank you" or sit up to give you a smile of gratitude. Therefore "lovingkindness of lying" must be the type of lovingkindness that is done with the ulterior motive of a reward of some sort. 

We have difficulties with the חן/kindness principle. Even if only in our subconscious, we look forward to rewards for our unselfish actions, even if it is just the warm feeling that comes from doing unselfish acts. Human nature is such that we need incentives. We have difficulty with the idea of giving without being rewarded with at least recognition or  an acknowledgment of some sort. Our Master Yeshua who is aware of our natural selfish nature warned us against that attitude in, 
 
What reward do you get if you love only those who love you? Why, even tax-collectors do that! And if you are friendly only to your friends, are you doing anything out of the ordinary? Even the Goyim do that! Therefore, be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect. 
(Mat 5:46-48 CJB)

 

Taking this further, here is a part of a teaching from Rabbi Chayim P. Scheinberg, head of Yeshiva Torah Or in Jerusalem. he says that, 'A woman should not look at her daily chores; she should be happy for the opportunity to take care of her home, especially caring for the children.' 
     Indeed when we feel like complaining about the dishes, let's remember that we have those dishes because HaShem in His great kindness provided us with something to eat. When we complain about house-cleaning we should think of those outside subject to the elements and who would be happy to have a home to clean. The sometime daunting task of raising children should always remind us that HaShem blessed us with them. Children rarely appreciate what their mothers do for them (until perhaps they have children of their own), so it is real "Chesed shel emet/kindness of truth" to care for young children.  Sometimes spouses don't appreciate  all the other does for them; therefore in order to work, marriage requires this sort of unrewarded kindness.
     While we would easily accept the idea of serving unselfishly in the name of some cause or mission, we have a hard time accepting doing it for our own families. But what it the difference? When we serve people or a cause, there is the reward of recognition which sometimes families fail to give us. But in the eyes of the Father, the later is more  meritorious than the former. 
This principle can be applied to the one who stays home taking care of children, cooking,and cleaning the house, as well as to the one who goes out  to "bring in the bacon" (turkey bacon of course :-)). Often that person has to be subjected to intense demands of jobs or assignments that they may or may not like; working with colleagues that they may or may not like; under a boss that they usually don't like and in less than perfect situations, But they are doing it for the chesed Torah obedience act of caring for their families, who may or may not show what they consider is the due appreciation for their efforts. Working under the negatives of these situation are the meritorious parts in eyes of HaShem. 

I would like to take this further home and apply it to marriage.

Any given married person  feels sometimes like they are doing all the giving while the other is only taking. Chances are  that the other feels the same. That is because both look at things from the perspective of different lenses. More often than not, they are both right in their own merits so they refuse to see things from the other's point of view. At this point, it seems hopeless. 
     What we have to realize then is that according to the teachings of Torah and of our Master, while it is encouraged to be giving encouragement and praise to those who serve us, it is not wrong to do one-way giving without any expectations in return. It is actually meritorious to do that. Again, our Master said, 

What credit is it to you if you love only those who love you? 
Why, even sinners love those who love them. 
What credit is it to you if you do good only to those who do good to you? Even sinners do that. 
What credit is it to you if you lend only to those who you expect will pay you back? Even sinners lend to each other, expecting to be repaid in full.
(Luk 6:32-34 CJB)

Here is another article to illustrate the idea.

When Rabbi Moshe of Kobrin was 7 years old there was a severe famine in Lithuania. Poor people wandered from village to village in search of food. Many of them flocked to the home of Rav Moshe's mother, who readily cooked and baked for them. Once a very large number of the poor came to her home and she had to cook for them in shifts. When some individual grew impatient and insulted her, she began to cry, since she felt that she was doing her utmost for them. Her young son, the future Rabbi of Kobrin said to her, "Why should their insults trouble you? Don't their insults help you perform the mitzvah [commandment] with sincerity? If they had praised you, your merit would be less, since you might be doing the kindness to get their praise, rather than to fulfill the Almighty's command."

This anecdote goes against our natural reaction that would have the young rabbi protect his mother against the insults of the ungrateful beggar. Instead, the young Rabbi reminded her of the Torah which encourages us to forego earthly praise and acknowledgements for our good deeds in favor of heavenly praise and recognition. In this manner the young Rabbi protected more than his mother's present earthly temporary suffering; he secured and protected her future heavenly eternal reward!
     This sounds much like what the writer in the Book of Hebrew wrote concerning the women of the persecuted Jewish messianic community in first century Israel, women who refused, ... to be ransomed, so that they would gain a better resurrection. (Heb 11:35)
    This anecdote also illustrates the Master's teaching, 
"Be careful not to parade your acts of tzedakah in front of people in order to be seen by them! If you do, you have no reward from your Father in heaven. So, when you do tzedakah, don't announce it with trumpets to win people's praise, like the hypocrites in the synagogues and on the streets. Yes! I tell you, they have their reward already! But you, when you do tzedakah, don't even let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. Then your tzedakah will be in secret; and your Father, who sees what you do in secret, will reward you. 
(Mat 6:1-4 CJB)



I have heard of congregations closing down because of elder burn out. The work load always rested on the same people who eventually couldn't take it anymore. It is sad. As congregation members we should always seek what we can do for our congregation rather than what the congregation can do for us. 
     Whereas this situation is deplorable, congregation leaders should consider it an honor and privilege (not a chore) to serve those whom HaShem calls "His people", those whom Yeshua felt the need to serve to the point of giving His life though they were not at that time thankful for it. It is all a question of perspective: what is the reason for our service.
       This  reminds me of a story I heard. Two men were found on a synagogue building site. One complained as he went though the monotonous job of setting bricks in mortar to build a steady wall. Another man seemed to shine with glory as he accomplished the very same task. When asked the reason for his seeming joy, the replied, "I am building a house for the Torah; a place when HaShem's people will learn and maybe generate great teachers!" The two men were doing the same job, but perspective and vision made the difference as to how they saw their mission.

Our Master's acts of kindness were rewarded with man's ignominy and hatred. As such, Yeshua followed the sample of His Father  who out of love for us gave His Son as a ransom for our Torah-breaking. 

MAY WE LEARN TO DO WHAT IS RIGHT WHETHER WE ARE REWARDED OR NOT. 

MAY WE LEARN IN EVERYTHING WE DO TO PERFORM FOR AN AUDIENCE OF 'ONE'; FOR HE WHO IS THE FATHER OF ALL KINDNESS AND TRUTH.

​R' Gavriel Lumbroso


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PAR'SHAT VAYIGASH: Peace Between Brothers of Good Will!

12/20/2017

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PEACE BETWEEN BROTHERS OF GOOD WILL

 ... ויגשׁ אליו יהודה

Then Y'hudah approached Yosef ...
(Gen 44:18)



If you have been following our weekly midrashes, you have probably seen that I dissect these parashas according to authentic Jewish and Chassidic eschatological traditions, as well as fish heavily for ethical patterns. Par'shat Vayigash brings a conclusion to both.

The sages of Israel often associated the peace, plenty, security, and love of The World to Come, with the resolution of the conflict between the two Houses of Israel, the House of Judah (Southern kingdom/Leah), and the House of Ephrayim (Northern Kingdom/Rachel). Our text this week takes us to this important resolution, and therefore on the prophetic path envisioned by the prophet Ezekiel in a vision preceding that of the great war of Gog and Magog (chapter 38-39),

"You, human being, take one stick and write on it, 'For Y'hudah and those joined with him [among] the people of Isra'el.' Next, take another stick and write on it, 'For Yosef, the stick of Efrayim, and all the House of Isra'el who are joined with him.' Finally, bring them together into a single stick, so that they become one in your hand. When your people ask you what all this means, tell them that Adonai Elohim says this: 'I will take the stick of Yosef, which is in the hand of Efrayim, together with the tribes of Isra'el who are joined with him, and put them together with the stick of Y'hudah and make them a single stick, so that they become one in my hand.' (Eze 37:16-19 CJB)

We see today a preliminary time of this united Israelite nation in the nation of Israel itself, where all the descendants of Jacob are called 'Jews', descendant of Judah, regardless of which tribe they originally belong to. 

Our parasha takes us to the mechanics of this union. As we read last week, Joseph tests his brothers as to their resolve of repentance, and also as to their attitude towards their father. Were they going to break his heart again by easily giving up Benjamin and thus, as children of Leah, secure their own inheritance from the House of Rachel? As we saw, the House of Leah passed the test. Judah rose to the occasion when he offered himself as a slave to Pharaoh instead of Benjamin, in order to protect his father Jacob.

So now if I go to your servant my father, and the boy isn't with us -- seeing how his heart is bound up with the boy's heart, --when he sees that the boy isn't with us, he will die; and your servants will bring the gray hair of your servant our father down to Sh'ol with grief. For your servant himself guaranteed his safety; I said, 'If I fail to bring him to you, then I will bear the blame before my father forever.' Therefore, I beg you, let your servant stay as a slave to my lord instead of the boy, and let the boy go up with his brothers. For how can I go up to my father if the boy isn't with me? I couldn't bear to see my father so overwhelmed by anguish." (Gen 44:30-34 CJB)

On a side note, this story shows us the truth in the old adage, 'As long as there is life there is hope!' We often do wrong things in life, things that we feel we can never correct. But if later, if even much later, the path of our life takes us to a situation that is similar to the one we have previously miserably failed in; if at that time we draw from the lessons learned and the maturing caused by that miserable failure and make the right decision, it serves as an atonement, as a second chance to pass the test, and this time get a A+.  HaShem is truly the God of second chances.

Back to Judah and Joseph. The mechanics that establish the cosmic reconciliation between Judah and Joseph are very simple, and were the ones taught to us by the Master. 

Let's first look at Joseph. The important ingredient that Joseph needed to bring to the table, was his total faith in HaShem, which caused him to not desire to avenge himself from his brothers,

Yosef said to his brothers, "Please! Come closer." And they came closer. 
He said, "I am Yosef, your brother, whom you sold into Egypt. But don't be sad that you sold me into slavery here or angry at yourselves, because it was God who sent me ahead of you to preserve life. ... God sent me ahead of you to ensure that you will have descendants on earth and to save your lives in a great deliverance. So it was not you who sent me here, but God; and he has made me a father to Pharaoh, lord of all his household and ruler over the whole land of Egypt.  (Gen 45:4-8 CJB)

Here, Joseph showed us the true meaning of HaShem's injunction through Moses and Paul.

Don't take vengeance on, or bear a grudge against any of your people; rather, love your neighbor as yourself; I am Adonai. (Lev 19:18 CJB)

Never seek revenge, my friends; instead, leave that to God's anger; for in the Tanakh it is written, "Adonai says, 'Vengeance is my responsibility; I will repay.' "  (Rom 12:19 CJB)

Now is the time to take stock of our lives. Do we bear any grudges for the suffering caused us by others? Does our attitude towards it conflict with these verses? The Master tells us,

So if you are offering your gift at the Temple altar and you remember there that your brother has something against you, leave your gift where it is by the altar, and go, make peace with your brother. Then come back and offer your gift. (Mat 5:23-24 CJB)

Now let's look at Judah's participation in the peace-making process.

Judah really had a change of heart. From, "... what advantage is it to us if we kill our brother and cover up his blood? Come, let's sell him to the Yishma`elim, instead of putting him to death with our own hands. After all, he is our brother, our own flesh." ... (Gen 37:26-27 CJB) to, "Therefore, I beg you, let your servant stay as a slave to my lord instead of the boy, and let the boy go up with his brothers. For how can I go up to my father if the boy isn't with me? I couldn't bear to see my father so overwhelmed by anguish."(Gen 44:33-34 CJB), Judah made a 180 degree reversal. An example of true repentance which HaShem greatly honored. This radical change from the pits of selfishness to the grandeur of giving himself for his brother and father, earned his house the crown of Israel. 

If you have really turned from your sins to God, produce fruit that will prove it!  (Mat 3:8 CJB)

Pain [repentance] handled in God's way, produces a turning from sin to God, which leads to salvation, and there is nothing to regret in that! ... (2Co 7:10 CJB)

The deeds of the fathers are truly portent to the children. In their deeds, the fathers not only show us that they learned obedience through the things that they suffered, but they also left us a blueprint on how to also bring the Kingdom of God on earth today, in our families, congregations and communities, and that before it eventually covers the earth as the waters cover the seas. 

MAY WE LEARN LIKE JOSEPH TO PUT AWAY RESENTMENT, GRUDGES, AND DESIRE FOR VENGEANCE.
MAY WE LEARN LIKE JUDAH WHAT IS THE MEANING OF TRUE REPENTANCE, AND HONESTLY CHANGE OUR WAYS, SO THAT AS THE MASTER TAUGHT US TO PRAY TO OUR FATHER:

 תבא מלכותך ... כאשר בשמים גם בארץ׃

"MAY YOUR KINGDOM COME ... ON EARTH AS IT IS IN HEAVEN"

​R' GAVRIEL LUMBROSO

(Mat 6:10 CJB)

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PAR'SHAT MIKETZ: Gam Zo L'Tova (Even this is for Good!)

12/12/2017

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... ועתה לא־אתם שׁלחתם אתי הנה כי האלהים
So it was not you who sent me here, but God; ...
(Gen 45:8)


The story of Joseph lends itself to many midrashes. The sages of Israel have always paralleled the life of Joseph with that of a future Messiah and indeed they were right. 
  • As Joseph was, Messiah was favored of His Father and sent to check on His brethren who rejected His leadership. 
  • They put Him in an underground pit for three days and sold him to the Gentiles for silver. 
  • Whereas the Torah text says 20 pieces of silver, some talmudic sources say 30.  
  • As Messiah does till this day, Joseph ruled among the Gentiles, until such a time when His brothers came to Him. 
  • After testing their hearts, Joseph came out from under his Egyptian appearance and revealed himself. 
  • Just like with Joseph of old, today the Jewish people see Messiah as a foreign leader. There will come a time when He will take off his 'Christian Greeco-Roman' garb and reveal Himself to His brethren as the true King of the Jews. May it be soon Abba, even in our days!


I believe that the lives of the patriarchs are blueprints for us to learn from. That is why in these weekly newsletters I have mostly been looking for the ethical values in their lifestyle, and the life of Joseph is rich with examples for us to emulate.

It seems that Joseph lived his life according to Murphy's law, 'If anything can go wrong, it will!' Anyone in his situation could have easily given in to despondency, discouragement, bitterness and anger, but he did not. In this we again see the life patterns that were adopted by his father Jacob, his grand-father Isaac, and great-grand-father Abraham. It is the opinion of this writer that it was not because of a cosmic divine predestination to be the custodian of the covenant that Joseph extolled these virtues, but that it was because he extolled these virtues that HaShem chose him. I believe this principle applies to all the patriarchs as well as with us today: virtue precedes acknowledgment just obedience precedes blessing. As the Master taught, it is our meekness; it is our hunger for righteousness, mercy, purity of heart and peace-making, which brings down HaShem's blessing,

"How blessed are the poor in spirit! for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs. "How blessed are those who mourn! for they will be comforted. "How blessed are the meek! for they will inherit the Land! "How blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness! for they will be filled. "How blessed are those who show mercy! for they will be shown mercy. "How blessed are the pure in heart! for they will see God. "How blessed are those who make peace! for they will be called sons of God. "How blessed are those who are persecuted because they pursue righteousness! for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs. (Mat 5:3-10)
  

Many people teach that Yeshua is angry with his people, the Jewish people, for what happened 2,000 years ago. Many even, consciously or sub-consciously, exonerate themselves from the guilt of the Holocaust by saying that it was HaShem's punishment on  the Jews who deserved it for their rebellious disobedience (so they say). It is strange, because HaShem's anger with the wicked only lasts three or four generations, not 2,000 years. It is His showing of grace and forgiveness for the sake of the righteousness of their fathers which lasts for thousands of generation,

... showing grace to the thousandth generation, forgiving offenses, crimes and sins; yet not exonerating the guilty, but causing the negative effects of the parents' offenses to be experienced by their children and grandchildren, and even by the third and fourth generations."
(Exo 34:7)


One of the most beautiful verses in the Bible (in my opinion) are these ones:

Then Yosef hurried out, because his feelings toward his brother were so strong that he wanted to cry; he went into his bedroom and there he wept. Then he washed his face and came out, but he controlled himself as he gave the order to serve the meal. 
(Gen 43:30-31)

At last Yosef could no longer control his feelings in front of his attendants and cried, "Get everybody away from me!" So no one else was with him when Yosef revealed to his brothers who he was. He wept aloud, and the Egyptians heard, and Pharaoh's household heard. 
(Gen 45:1-2)

In these verses about Joseph, I hear and I see my Messiah' tears of love and compassion, as well as of desire to be with His people again. Even so, I believe that today Messiah weeps with Joseph. He weeps for joy at the knowledge that the time is soon coming when He will be reunited with His people to observe the Feasts together  with them again. The sad question here is that as the Torah mentions that 'the Egyptians heard, and Pharaoh's household heard.', do the nations today hear the tears of Messiah for His people?

There is a rationale that helped Joseph to not give in to seeking vengeance at the time when he was in a position to do so mightily; a rationale that that helped him to live by the apostolic command,  

Never seek revenge, my friends; instead, leave that to God's anger; for in the Tanakh it is written, "Adonai says, 'Vengeance is my responsibility; I will repay.' "
(Rom 12:19; Deut 32:35-36)


What is this rationale? It is expressed in these very poignant words:

... don't be sad that you sold me into slavery here or angry at yourselves, because it was God who sent me ahead of you to preserve life. The famine has been over the land for the last two years, and for yet another five years there will be neither plowing nor harvest. God sent me ahead of youto ensure that you will have descendants on earth and to save your lives in a great deliverance. So it was not you who sent me here, but God; and he has made me a father to Pharaoh, lord of all his household and ruler over the whole land of Egypt.(Gen 45:5-8)

In essence, Joseph did not attribute all that happened to him to his family situation, but rightfully to HaShem. He did not blame his brothers not his family, he only saw HaShem in all that happened to him.

Even the events that transpired during the Greek empire and that caused the Maccabee revolt are for the good. Among many other lessons, they remind us of HaShem's love and faithfulness towards His people. 

May we also with Joseph, the patriarchs, the Maccabees, Yeshua, Paul, Peter, James, John, and all the others:
 learn to attribute both the seemingly positive and the seemingly negative phases of our lives to HaShem so that we do not grow roots of bitterness against friends and families.
May we learn to see HaShem's hand in all that happens to us and realize that whether we see it or not in this life, that it was in order to preserve life. As the apostle said,

... we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called in accordance with his purpose; 
(Rom 8:28)

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PAR'SHAT VAYESHEV: Tamar, the Faithful Daughter-in Law!

12/5/2017

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  ויהי כמשׁלשׁ חדשׁים ויגד ליהודה לאמר זנתה תמר כלתך וגם הנה הרה לזנונים ויאמר יהודה הוציאוה ותשׂרף׃ 
 הוא מוצאת והיא שׁלחה אל־חמיה לאמר לאישׁ אשׁר־אלה לו אנכי הרה ותאמר הכר־נא למי החתמת והפתילים והמטה האלה׃ 

About three months later Y'hudah was told, "Tamar your daughter-in-law has been acting like a whore; moreover, she is pregnant as a result of her prostitution." Y'hudah said, "Bring her out, and let her be burned alive!" When she was brought out, she sent this message to her father-in-law: "I am pregnant by the man to whom these things belong. Determine, I beg you, whose these are -- the signet, the cords and the staff." (Gen 38:24-25)



Tamar did not want to publicly shame Yehudah, so she only said "By the man whose these are . . . ", rather than "Yehudah is the father". Rabbi' Yonah writes that these words teach us that one should rather put his life at risk rather than publicly shaming another. 

ANECDOTE:
   In Eastern Europe it was the job of the shamash to tend to the synagogue's oven early every morning during the freezing winters. Thus when people came at daybreak to recite T'hilim [Psalms] or to study before prayer, they found the place warm. In a certain synagogue the shamash would rely on the out-of-town beggars who normally arrived during the night, to light the oven. But many times the beggars would not show up, and the synagogue would be freezing in the morning. people began to complain. Then all the complaints stopped; the oven was fire-hot every morning. people thought the shamash was doing a good job , and the shamash took it for granted that the beggars were tending the oven. No one suspected that the rabbi of Baranovitch, Rabbi Israel Yaakov Lubchanski, was the one doing the job every morning.
   Early one morning the wood happened to be particularly wet., so that it required a lot of blowing to get a fire going. With his head in the oven door, Rav Israel Yaakov was blowing upon the fire when the shamamsh walked in. In the darkness of the winter dawn, he did not recognize the Rabbi. Sure that one of the beggars was tending the oven, the shamash, in a 'joking' manner gave the man a kick.  Rabbi Lubchanski knew that if he took his head out of the oven, the shamash would be terribly embarrassed. So he pushed his face deeper into the oven. The smoke was burning hie eyes and choking his lungs, yet he would not remove his head until the shamash left. By the time the shamash walked away, half of the Rabbi's beard was gone -- it had caught fire!

When it comes to correcting others, we may have a tendency to be "tongue happy"! We feel it our duty to publicly expose and correct everyone else's wrong; other people's faults or frailties, even those of the fathers of our faith who HaShem calls "beloved"! We are so arrogant that we don't have qualms as to publicly criticizing Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Judah or Tamar in some of their deeds that may look to us questionable, questionable of course by our contemporary hypocritical sense of morality; a sense of morality which has so 'sophistic-ized' sin that not only it doesn't even appear to be sin anymore, but it parades as righteousness.

Here is what Paul had to say about the sense of people morality in the days preceding the Day of Mashiach, a Day closer to us now than it was in the days of Paul:

Moreover, understand this: in the acharit-hayamim will come trying times. People will be self-loving, money-loving, proud, arrogant, insulting, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, uncontrolled, brutal, hateful of good, traitorous, headstrong, swollen with conceit, loving pleasure rather than God, as they retain the outer form of religion but deny its power.  (2Ti 3:1-5)

Are we then, in our generation, fit to criticize the deeds of the patriarchs? Would we do it to their face? We should never level an accusation against someone who is not present, be they dead or alive, yet how many of us feel free to judge and demonize others through the Internet? Why do we do it? Do we really believe that by blowing someone else's candle ours shines brighter? Our Master said it in his own words:

"Always treat others as you would like them to treat you; that sums up the teaching of the Torah and the Prophets. (Mat 7:12)

From Abraham to Yeshua, the custodians of the covenant, the leaders of our faith,have held on to the covenant at any cost, be it of their lives or reputation.  As such, they "... became imitators of ... the Lord; ... " (1Th 1:6 CJB), of He whom HaShem made "...  to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.(2Co 5:21 ESV). As such, they do not deserve our criticism; we are not fit judges of their deeds. 

Tamar seems to have followed that very idea; she seems to have taken a page from Rebecca her grand-mother-in law's book as she entered Judah's family. Here is a contextual synopsis of the story.
     Judah's father, Jacob, is in dire straight. He is still mourning the loss of Joseph. He needs to rethink the leadership line. He disinherited Reuben, his first son for having shamed him with a concubine. The two next ones, Simeon and Levi, turned out to be cold murderers in the issue of Dina their sister. Now Jacob looks to Judah for leadership, but Judah goes and marries a cana'anite woman. Things don't look good for Jacob's family.  Let's look at the story in Genesis 38:6-30.
(6) Y'hudah took a wife for `Er his firstborn, and her name was Tamar.

(7) But `Er, Y'hudah's firstborn, was evil from Adonai's perspective, so Adonai killed him.

(8) Y'hudah said to Onan, "Go and sleep with your brother's wife -- perform the duty of a husband's brother to her, and preserve your brother's line of descent."

     This was a very common practice in those days...


(9) However, Onan knew that the child would not count as his; so whenever he had intercourse with his brother's wife, he spilled the semen on the ground, so as not to give his brother offspring.

     This practice constituted an economic sacrifice because the inheritance would be shared with the seed of the brother. Onan pretended to do the right thing but did not, a type of hypocrisy which Hashem hates. It would be better not to do it at all!
(10) What he did was evil from Adonai's perspective, so he killed him too.
(11) Then Y'hudah said to Tamar his daughter-in-law, "Stay a widow in your father's house until my son Shelah grows up"; for he thought, "I don't want him to die too, like his brothers." So Tamar went and lived at home with her father.
(12) In due time, Shua's daughter, the wife of Y'hudah, died. After Y'hudah had been comforted, he went up to be with his sheep-shearers in Timnah, he and his friend Hirah the `Adulami.
(13) Tamar was told, "Your father-in-law has gone up to Timnah to shear his sheep."
(14) So she took off her widow's clothes, completely covered her face with her veil, and sat at the entrance to `Einayim, which is on the way to Timnah. For she saw that Shelah had grown up, but she still was not being given to him as his wife.


     Judah felt that Tamar, the Cana'anite was 'bad news', but Tamar had a plan ...

(15) When Y'hudah saw her, he thought she was a prostitute, because she had covered her face.
(16) So he went over to her where she was sitting and said, not realizing that she was his daughter-in-law, "Come, let me sleep with you." She answered, "What will you pay to sleep with me?"

(17) He said, "I will send you a kid from the flock of goats." She said, "Will you also give me something as a guarantee until you send it"

(18) He answered, "What should I give you as a guarantee?" She said, "Your seal, with its cord, and the staff you're carrying in your hand." So he gave them to her, then went and slept with her; and she conceived by him.

     Judah left with her his ID and main credit cards as a guarantee.
(19) She got up and went away, took off her veil and put on her widow's clothes.

(20) Y'hudah sent the kid with his friend the `Adulami to receive the guarantee items back from the woman, but he couldn't find her.

(21) He asked the people near where she had been, "Where is the prostitute who was on the road at `Einayim?" But they answered, "There hasn't been any prostitute here."

(22) So he returned to Y'hudah and said, "I couldn't find her; also the people there said, 'There hasn't been any prostitute here.' "

(23) Y'hudah said, "All right, let her keep the things, so that we won't be publicly shamed. I sent the kid, but you didn't find her."

(24) About three months later Y'hudah was told, "Tamar your daughter-in-law has been acting like a whore; moreover, she is pregnant as a result of her prostitution." Y'hudah said, "Bring her out, and let her be burned alive!"

(25) When she was brought out, she sent this message to her father-in-law: "I am pregnant by the man to whom these things belong. Determine, I beg you, whose these are -- the signet, the cords and the staff."

     The Hebrew text here is very interesting. It says, "...recognize whose ..."
 ...הכר־נא למי

     The exact same Hebrew wording Judah used to deceive his father when he brought back Joseph's bloody coat pretending that a wild animal had killed Joseph (Gen 37:32). 
     Judah must have felt like his father Jacob felt when he was deceived by Laban in the same way he had to deceive his own father Isaac in the affair of the birthrights, (affair in which Esau was the real deceiver as he should have told Isaac that he had sold the birthright to his brother in a fair and square deal, and therefore could not inherit the blessing).  
(26) Then Y'hudah acknowledged owning them. He said, "She is more righteous than I, because I didn't let her become the wife of my son Shelah." And he never slept with her again.

     Here is the punch line. Tamar believed in the promises that came to Judah though Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. At the cost of her own reputation, at the cost of making herself look like a sinner, she actually played the role of goel/redeemer to Judah, her father-in-law in order to assure him a succession, a succession which will bring Messiah. 

As a daughter-in-law who was rejected and who had to shamefully return to her father's household, she could have hated Judah's family. This is what would happen inj this day and age when in-laws relationships are proverbially acrimonious. But Tamar saw beyond her own wounded ego (and we should take sample from that). Instead, she believed in the covenant of the Jewish family she joined and continued to uphold it and work for it. She made sure to do everything she could, even at her own cost, to bring it to pass. This is love for the covenant as portrayed by the patriarchs and their wives.
(27) When she went into labor, it became evident that she was going to have twins.

(28) As she was in labor, one of them put out his hand; and the midwife took his hand and tied a scarlet thread on it, saying, "This one came out first."

(29) But then he withdrew his hand, and his brother came out; so she said, "How did you manage to break out first?" Therefore he was named Peretz [breaking out].

(30) Then out came his brother, with the scarlet thread on his hand, and he was given the name Zerach [scarlet].

Ruth is another Gentile who had a principal role in the seed of Messiah. She also played the role of redeemer/Goel raising seed for the broken genealigical line of messiah.
 
The book of Ruth ends with the genealogy of the Peretz, the son of Tamar,

Here is the genealogy of Peretz. Peretz was the father of Hetzron, Hetzron was the father of Ram, Ram was the father of `Amminadav, `Amminadav was the father of Nachshon, Nachshon was the father of Salmon, Salmon was the father of Bo`az, Bo`az was the father of `Oved, `Oved was the father of Yishai, and Yishai was the father of David.(Rth 4:18-22 CJB)

And from David the genealogy continues to Messiah. 
Through her work, Tamar is given the honor of entering the genealogy to Messiah.


​AS WE READ THESE STORIES

AS WE READ THESE WORDS
MAY WE, NOT JUDGE OUR FATHERS 
BUT RATHER LEARN TO EMULATE THEIR LOVE FOR THE COVENANT AND FOR THE PEOPLE TO WHOM IT WAS GIVEN.
MAY WE ALSO BE FOUND WITH SUCH LOVE FOR THE COVENANT AS TO BE WILLING TO GIVE UP OUR REPUTATION, EVEN OUR LIVES FOR IT!

Brothers, stop speaking against each other! 
Whoever speaks against a brother or judges a brother is speaking against Torah and judging Torah. 
And if you judge Torah, you are not a doer of what Torah says, but a judge. 
There is but one Giver of Torah; he is also the Judge, with the power to deliver and to destroy. 
Who do you think you are, judging your fellow human being? 
(Jas 4:11-12 CJB)
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